Deep Space Holidays
by Shadsie
Summary: A Christmas story. Holidays on Project SEEDS are strange, and Rem deeply misses her lost Alex. Little Vash and Knives are learning about the holidays for the first time. Sensing their caretaker's sadness, they conspire to get Rem the perfect gift.


Disclaimer: Trigun – don't own it. I wouldn't mind owning it, but if I did, Vash would probably be a swordsman instead of a gunman or something! Anyway, Trigun and its characters belong to the great Yasuhiro Nightow, whom I hope will finish off his manga soon, and well.

General Notes: Anime-universe based, with a wee little bit of manga referencing if you've read up to a certain point in the manga and are quick enough to catch it. G-rated. Pure fluff. Unlike much of my fanfiction, this is one of my "cute" pieces. This fic may give you cavities.

This has been posted to two online communities. Was planning on posting it the 24th or 25th here, but didn't get around to it. So, here's your post-Christmas Christmas-fic.

Constructive criticism for general writing style is appreciated. – To those who may suspect that I've "lost my edge" – don't worry, this was just a random idea that came to me that I needed to get out of my system. Future fics from me will probably be dark/dramatic/tragic/creepy as per usual. (Hmmm… especially if I ever get off my duff to write those "Requiem from the Darkness" fanfics I have in mind…)

Anyway, "Deep Space Holidays." Enjoy!

* * *

oOo

* * *

"DEEP SPACE HOLIDAYS"

She'd told herself that if she was alone, anyplace was the same. It really wasn't true. She missed Earth. She missed fresh air that wasn't artificially created, free air that wasn't confined to the womb of steel that was the spaceship she now called home. Of course, the air back on Earth wasn't entirely fresh – she remembered the polluted city air. Still, life felt freer there, on that dying world.

Rem looked down at the bracelet on her wrist. She only wore it this time of year. The band of round, polished garnets set in gold was the last Christmas present Alex had given her. It was mid-December, according to the calendars the crew kept. After January 1st, Rem would take the bracelet off and put it in her jewelry box once again. Alex had intended for her to wear it all year long, but keeping it on beyond the winter holidays reminded her too much of loss. She could only bear to wear the band for a month.

Vash and Knives were sleeping on the couch in the "living room" part of her – their personal quarters. They were cuddled up together beneath a fleece throw, long golden hair spilling over their faces. They looked just like young angels.

"I suppose I'm not really alone," Rem whispered to herself with a smile. "You would have loved them, Alex. They're just like… what we would have wanted…"

She got up from her chair and walked out of her quarters, leaving the twins to sleep. She wandered to one of the great side windows of the ship. Rem watched the stars.

She'd been awake and on duty for over two years now, this shift. Every year, the crew would celebrate the holidays, just because it reminded everyone of home. It cheered everyone up during the long shifts, and helped them forget, for a while, where they were and what had happened to home. It was a bit of normalcy in a strange situation.

Rem wanted to give that to Vash and Knives holidays. They'd already celebrated Halloween, though the only people to beg candy from on the ship were the small crew of five, including herself. She'd made costumes for them, because they'd read about Halloween in books from the ship's library and wanted to try Trick-Or-Treating. She'd made Vash a little black suit so he could be a black cat. Knives wrapped himself in sheets and powdered his skin with flour in order to be a ghost. Joey, Mary and Rowan gave them donuts and candy for their efforts. Steve told them that they "didn't have to dress up to be monsters."

Now, Christmas was nearing. Rem celebrated Christmas. Joey celebrated Chanukah, in his own, private way. Mary and Rowan didn't really believe in anything religious-wise, but they celebrated Christmas for the secular aspects. Steve's favorite holiday was New Year's Eve. Rem made an effort to teach Vash and Knives about all the holidays. She did not believe in pressing any one set of beliefs upon them. She thought they should choose what they wished to believe in for themselves. She did not even know if human religion applied to their kind. They were so beyond anything that humans yet knew. She liked to think of them as angels.

Knives was skeptical when it came to religious things. Vash told Rem that he wanted to believe what she believed, but Rem wasn't entirely sure of her beliefs herself. The long voyage and the hardships she'd faced in life, the hardships Humanity had faced – it made her wonder if God was cruel, a being who laughed at Man's struggles. Was He even watching them, in deep space? Christmas wasn't the same here as it was back on Earth.

And, Alex wasn't with her anymore. All her family was gone. When she was alone, she had Alex to lean on, then, one day, he was gone, too. She had been in and out of Coldsleep with the crew five times already, on their rotating shifts. She'd been asleep for all of eighty years. No one she had known back on Earth was alive now, not even passing acquaintances.

Rem sighed, looked out at the unblinking stars and fingered the blood-red stones on her wrist. She wondered if Alex was watching over her from somewhere beyond those stars.

* * *

"Of course Santa will come for us!" Knives argued. "How can you even think he won't? He's supposed to come to all good boys and girls and Rem thinks we're good!" 

"But," Vash said, "We read about reindeer, and saw that disc… they breathe oxygen, like us! And I think Santa breathes oxygen, too! Santa can't drive his sleigh in deep space! He and the reindeer would die!"

"Vash, you're not thinking again!" Knives whined. "Santa Claus is magic! So are the reindeer! They can fly around in space because they're protected by magic!"

For everything the boys disagreed on, Santa was one thing they both wanted to believe in. However, they had their disagreements about him. Knives sighed. He usually was the one of the pair to "think with his head" while Vash was the one to "think with his heart." This time, however, Vash was thinking too logically, and it was maddening.

"I think Santa only comes to kids on Earth," Vash said. "It says he flies around the Earth in all the stories we've read. Just Earth! I don't know if he can fly in space, Knives. Besides, he gives presents to human children, we're not…"

"Maybe Santa's a Plant!" Knives exclaimed. "He's supposed to be immortal, so maybe… maybe he's just like us!"

"I don't think so, Knives," Vash replied. "Santa was around before people invented the Plants. Most of the stories say he's an Elf."

"But… but…" Knives protested, "Maybe Plants are descended from Elves!"

The boys turned their heads as Rem stepped into the room, their attention off each other and off their forgotten board game. "So much shouting in here!" Rem said. "Are you boys having a fight?"

"No, Rem…" Vash said sheepishly, "Not really."

"We were talking about Santa Claus," Knives said. "Vash doesn't think we'll get presents because he doesn't think Santa can come to us here in space. What do you think, Rem?"

"You will get presents," Rem said with a soft smile. "You've both been good. Do you remember what I told you? That Santa's really more about what's in your heart? He represents the spirit of giving. Anyway, boys, come with me, there's something I want to show you."

"What? What?" Vash chimed excitedly.

"Follow me," the woman answered. "It's something very special."

* * *

Eden was covered in white. A thick blanket of snow rested over the field and forest of the Recreation Room. "Isn't it wonderful?" Rem said. 

"What… what is it?" Knives asked, confused. Vash had an equally puzzled look on his face.

"It's snow." Rem replied. "We set Mildred to give us seasons and variant weather. It snowed last night."

"Mildred" was the name the crew had given to the Rec. Room's Geoplant. Vash and Knives had talked with her before, though she usually was very quiet. She preferred to rest within the deep recesses of her containment bulb and to concentrate on creating the climate and nurturing the plants and animals in the Recreation Room. The Engine Room Plants were a lot chattier.

"Snow?" Vash said, gently toeing some of it with the tip of his shoe. "Is that why we're dressed up in long pants and coats? It's cold in here.." He cautiously reached down and touched the snow on the ground with his bare hand. "It's cold!" he yelped. "And wet! I don't like it!"

"Oh, Vash, you just don't know how fun it can be! Put on your gloves. You too, Knives. Snow is what happens instead of rain when the air is cold enough. It's flakes of ice. I'll show you some scans of snowflakes taken under the microscope later. Each and every flake has its own unique pattern."

Rem knelt down in the snow. "It crunches under your feet when you walk… And you can make things with it, like snowmen. And you can do this."

Rem picked up a handful of snow and formed it into a small snowball. She playfully threw it at Vash. It spattered against his coat.

"Huh? What? What did you do that for, Rem?" Vash asked. He hid behind Knives.

"Don't be a baby, Vash," Knives said. He picked up a handful of snow. "It's neat!"

Rem laughed. "Don't worry so much, Vash! It will not hurt you! It's called a snowball fight. People make snowballs and throw them at each other. They don't hurt, they fall apart when they hit you. It's a game. If you hit someone else with a snowball, you win."

"Oh…" Vash asked. "But isn't fighting wrong?"

"This is just for fun, Vash. Alex and I used to do this all the time. Here, like this."

She took Vash's hands in hers and encouraged him to scoop up some snow. "You pat it like this to make a ball. See? Now, I dare you to hit me!" With that, Rem started running off across the field. Vash chased after her, as did Knives. Vash's throw missed. Knives' landed right in her back. She scooped up more snow and the snowball fight was on. The boys tossed balls at each other, and at Rem. The crisp cold air of the Recreation Room was filled with laughter.

With all the skidding down hills and sliding into snow banks, Rem reminisced.

* * *

Arm-in-arm, walking in the snow with Alex. Moments like these she treasured. A few flakes fell, flurries. The snow crunched beneath their feet as they walked through the woods. The air was cool and crisp, but not unbearably frigid. The trees were skeletal, their branches silvered with fresh snow. 

"I like this… I like this a lot," Alex said. "I grew up where it didn't snow, the desert. So, I'm like a kid, I guess… fascinated by this cold white stuff."

"It's cute," Rem replied. "I suppose I take it for granted, sometimes."

They walked on, watching their breath freeze on the air. "I'm… used to the woods, and this weather," Rem said. "It must be strange, growing up in the Southwest."

"It is," Alex said. "Some things are the same. People put up Christmas trees and lights. I just never got snow… as a kid. A little bit on the mountains around the city, but that all quickly melted off, and was never enough to do anything with."

Rem looked around. "Even here, it's a little gray. The air… This is one of the few areas that isn't city yet. I'm glad for a fresh snow like this. Some of it's been acidic lately."

"Poor old Earth…" Alex sighed. "Makes you wonder just how much more she can take. Maybe it's not too late to make things right again. Maybe we can make it right again."

"I like it when you talk like that, hopeful." Rem said. "She ran her hand along the hairs above his forehead. "You have a little snow in your hair there." She brushed it off, and looked into his eyes. The garnet bracelet slid down her wrist.

* * *

Something cold and wet hit her between the eyes. Rem blinked, cold slush running down her nose. 

"Rem?" Vash called. "Are you okay? You… look like you spaced out for a minute there. You just… stood there."

"Yeah," she said, wiping her eyes on her glove. "I'm okay."

She gathered up some snow. "Vengeance time!" she said, playfully. Vash and Knives let loose an exaggerated, comic scream and ran from her, ducking behind trees.

* * *

"Does Rem seem… sad to you?" Vash asked Knives as they sat in their bedroom, cups of hot cocoa in front of them. 

"What do you mean?" Knives said. "She seemed just fine this morning… She beaned you pretty good in the snowball fight."

"I know, but…" Vash sighed, "She seems so distant lately. She seems… sad."

"Maybe she misses home," Knives replied.

"That bracelet she wears," Vash said, "She said that Alex gave that to her, didn't she? I see her looking at it a lot. I think she misses Alex."

The twins sat across the table from each other looking at one another for a long time. They sipped their drinks.

Vash spoke up. "Rem said that… Kids get presents from Santa, but adults just give presents to each other to show love. Alex isn't here to give her presents."

"We should get her a present!" Knives exclaimed. "Maybe it will make her happy. We can show her she's not alone."

"That's a great idea, Knives! But… we're just kids… what can we get her?"

"She likes the snow…"

"But she likes flowers better!" Vash said. "She says she likes Spring. And she likes the color red and she loves red flowers. But… how do we get flowers? The Rec. Room's covered in snow."

"I have an idea," Knives said in a conspiratorial whisper. "Come on!"

* * *

"Santa did come! See, Vash! I told you!" 

The twins woke up the morning of December 25th to a small pile of wrapped presents beneath a little artificial, lighted pine tree in Rem's living quarters. Knives shouted his excitement, and of course, rubbed his "rightness" in the face of his brother.

"I told you Santa was magic enough! He probably had the reindeer wear space helmets!"

Rem laughed. "See what Santa brought you. Go on."

Torn wrapping paper flew everywhere.

"What is this?" Vash questioned, holding sections of his first present up curiously. He spun the little wheels. The tag on the gift was "From Rem" rather than "From Santa," like most of the presents were.

"It's a train," Rem answered. "You see, the cars all fit together and they run on the track." She began assembling the toy train set. "You remember I told you about trains, right? That dream I had? You wanted to know what a train was. This is it."

"But…" Vash questioned, "This is little. How could you fit in this?"

Rem laughed softly and sweetly. "This is just a model train. Real trains are big. They carry people from place to place. This is just a toy."

Knives opened one of his gifts. "A plush lion?" he asked. He looked at the tag on its ear. "Aslan?"

Rem nodded and smiled. "Santa must have known how much you liked the Narnia books."

"But…" Knives said, "I… I wanted a real lion!"

"Oh, but we couldn't take care of a real lion on this ship," Rem said. "Santa knows that. You know, lions like to be in a pride, and a lion here would be lonely without his family."

"I guess so," Knives said. He tentatively hugged his toy. "I'll love him!" he said.

The twins opened many small gifts, toys, books, new clothes that Rem had managed to make for them by staying up long nights sewing.

"There's nothing for you here, Rem," Vash said worriedly when he and Knives had finished unwrapping presents.

"That's okay," Rem said. "This is your holiday."

"No, Rem, that's not right. Come with us. Knives and I have something for you. It's in the Rec. Room."

"Huh?" Rem said.

"Come on!" Knives said, grabbing her arm.

"Okay! Okay! I'm coming!" Rem said, following the twins' lead as they tugged on her arms. They lead her out into the corridors, and down to the entrance of the Rec. Room.

The door slid open. Rem blinked.

The artificial sun shown brightly upon the great field and upon the hills. Not a bare patch of ground was showing, not even grass, but there was no snow.

Everything was covered in flowers. A few white, yellow and blue flowers peppered the ground, but aside from them, the field and the hills were a sea of red. There were wild roses, poppies, tulips, poinsettias and most of all, geraniums, all bright crimson.

"What is this?" Rem asked, awed.

"We talked to Mildred," Vash said. "We wanted to get a gift for you. We know how much you love red flowers, so we asked Mildred to do this for you today."

Rem blinked, stunned. She stared out over the Recreation Room. She stepped softly. "Really? You… you two did this for me?"

"Uh huh," Knives said with a nod.

She knelt down and scooped up the boys in a hug. She cried.

"Is there something wrong?" Vash asked. "Did we do something wrong?"

"No, no!" Rem said through her tears. "No… thank you… this means a lot to me."

Rem knew, in that moment, that though she'd lost Alex, that she wasn't truly alone.

END.

Shadsie.

December 2005.


End file.
